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stolen soul

My heart is jaded
Completely desolate inside
No longer feel alive

Depleted by negativity
Drained of all emotion
Impalpable to society
Always feeling like there is no place here for me

Now an isolated figure
so far away
Time has broken me
And plagued my memory

Detached from myself
Walking empty and alone
Soulless victim
Angel of misery



gugurnya tugu ilusi

Terhimpit pilu di dada,
Mengalir deras air mata,
Kala sepi terus melanda,
Sayu, pilu ku terasa...

Sewaktu dingin malam berlalu,
Bintang menjadi tempat mengadu,
Persoalan membelengu diri,
Duka menghiris hati ini.

Apakah memang ku bersalah?
Untuk memendam rasa cinta?
Adakah benar cinta yang ku alami?
Atau hanya sekadar ilusi?

Pabila ku hampir terlena,
Pelukan bayangmu yang ku rasa,
Alunan suaramu membisik sayu di telinga,
Lakaran wajahmu menghiasi mimpi indah...

Akan ku musnahkan tugu harapan,
Akan ku anggap kau sebagai teman,
Sekiranya kita berdua,
Tidak ditakdirkan bersama...



unanswered?

What has my lyfe morphed into?
I've been hurt,
Wounded ever so deeply.
But does anyone care?
You, you, or even you?
No, everybody's juz busy wit their lyfes.
Carin' for their own happiness,
Oblivious to the surrounding.
The fake, "I care for u!" phrase,
I'm tired of it all.
Just let me weep & cry in silence.
Let my heart bleed.
Coz it doesn't matter to u,
No it doesn't.
U dun even wonder y.
Do u?

Shattered,
Broken,
Hurt,
Tired,
Wounded,
Bruised,
Unanswered?

Wearin' a fake smile,
I enclosed the sadness in me..
I create lame jokes,
To liven up the joyness within me.
But does it really lasts long?
Am I that strong?
To hide how hurt I am?
Am I?

Leave me alone.
For all that matters now,
Im gonna be like u-
Ignorant to everytin'
It's no use to pretend that u care,
I'm dead.
Every hour & minute,
Is my death...



hanya untuk mu...

Tatkala bintang menemani bumi,
Memori dahulu ku kupas kembali.
Rindu pun bertandang,
Kemasyghulan menyelimuti hati...

Berbaring pada ambin kebingungan,
Aku menyelak tabir kenangan,
Mencari penamat beribu soalan...
"Mengapa? Mengapa? Aku gugup.

Seringkali bayangan mu diingati,
Kesyahduan menenggelami jiwa.
Aku dambakan belaian mu,
Tangan yang mengusap lembut dahiku...

Namun, semuanya telah ditelan waktu.
13 tahun sudah pun berlalu.
Kau telah lama pergi dan tidak mungkin kan kembali.
Aku mengerti, kau yang lebih disayangi...

Ayah, mungkinkah dikau sedang sentiasa
mendoakan puterimu ini?
Melihatku mengorak langkah ke alam dewasa...
Dari jendela istana abadimu disana?

Hanya dapat ku titip doa,
Diiringi jernih air mataku...
Semoga Tuhan menempatkanmu di tempat
orang-orang yang beriman.
Semoga jua Tuhan mencucuri rahmat keatas rohmu...
Amin.

prinsessa

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NNaive
UUnderstanding
RReliable
SShy
YYoung
AAdorable
HHypersensitive
IIrresistible
DDreamer
AArtistic

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Thursday, January 13, 2005

Sleepyheads r we? Hahaha... R we Jannah? R we Nurul? Nah.. We r juz hardwerkin' peepz who have used up much of our energy for sumtin' good. Aniwae, I'll story to u why todae I'm so blitzed & sleepy. Started the day by wakin' up late to skewl. Mum wanted to send me there by sharin' a cab but I refused, sayin' tat I cud juz walked across to Eunos. Saves tyme & simultaneously, saves expenses. The walk to Eunos was unbearably eerie. The mornin' dew & breeze tat passed thru me, sent chills down my spine. Tolerating it, I walked the longer route so as to 'tighten' my sense of secureness. They said, tat the bridge is haunted. Well, is it? Lucky me. My h/p radio accompanied me all the way frm tootland to Eunos. *Phew* I've reached Eunos juz in tyme. Again, met Jan at the rendezvous.

1st lesson was Bio lab- Made our grand entry as usual whilst everybdy was sitted at their places, lookin' at us (me, Jan, Nurul & Nisa). Our lecturer was absent for the second tyme! *sighs* Hmm... Neva mind. At least we still get to obtain sum info & look at the cadaver (dissected dead body). Oh well... Epliglottis, glottis, sphenoid, maxillary, laryngopharynx & blah.

B-R-E-A-K

2nd lesson was Clinical lab- Learned sum wound cleanin' & practised on it. U need any cleansing for ur wound juz cum & look for me aite! Haha. As if. Bear in mind I'm no pro okie.

Skewl ended at 2p.m. Jannah went over to my house to do sum project work. She kept complainin' tat she's sleepy todae. Actually, me too. I'm typin' all these now wit heavy eyes. damn sleepy todae! Showed sum tins to Jannah... Haha. Den, at 5 plus, we went out again to Nurul's. Mum nagged as I always go out. Wat to do? Project... "Oklah, oklah.. but dun cum home late!," she nagged me.

Hey.. it's midnite already.. Oh yeap, I'll tell u why the title is taugeh (beansprout). Jannah planned on wearin' a bunch of cauliflowers in her hair coz she noticed how lovely the Indians look wearin' sum flowers in their hair. I told her tat it will be better still if u wear all kinda veges so as to promote healthy snacking. We cud wear taugeh as our earrings!- Jannah recommended. I started tis kerazy dare tat we shud wear two taugehs on each ear for one whole dae todae (It's 12 plus already). Whoeva dint wear or the taugehs fall off, will have to be forfeited. The forfeit- Say, "Hi, Gud Mornin! How r u doin'?" to unknown peepz. Crap. I noe... Dun remind me. It's juz for fun okie! But for sure I'm not gonna wear any kinda veges on me! Imagine if it turns soggy! Gross...

Met Nurul at Tamp den went to KFC & waited for both Chimp & beruk to finish eatin'. WOW! Apes noe how to eat KFC! How clever r they indeed! Later, went to Nurul's & had fun!

I'll juz summarise the hilites:
  • Played pillow fight wit Jannah! Stoopid Chimp. Haha. For once u won! Congrats den...
  • Talked usin' loudspeaker wit Lydia a.k.a Orang Utan!
  • Discussed 'bout 'Z' thingy. HAHA... Funny ar... In case u dunno, tis is sarcasm.
  • Tips on how to make peepz smell nicely wonderful... Hahahaha..
  • Learned how to move clockwise direction while in lateral position.
  • Observed Nurul apply concealer on Jannah's eyes.
  • Rested coz I'm T-I-R-E-D!



Close-up pic of the lurvely gurl.. Eh, I said here, 'lurvely gurl', dun mind me puttin' these pics up k! 'Last' puhleeze...



Nurul, applyin' make-up on Jannah.. Hey, Nurul! U can open a make-up shop!

Hmm.. tat's all u need to noe... Oh yeap, I hate peepz passing my no. around. HELLOooo! I'm no passing parcel! Get it!

Okie, i'm idling rite now... Guess i'll have to start on my 'copyin' the Bio book process' now & finish my skewl project. Later my class starts at 10... *sighs again* so early! Eh Jan, dun forget the dare aite! I wanna rest my tired eyes & my achin' body now. Tataz, toodles & smuackies for deariez out there!





with love, syahida at 1/13/2005 11:49:00 PM

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