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stolen soul

My heart is jaded
Completely desolate inside
No longer feel alive

Depleted by negativity
Drained of all emotion
Impalpable to society
Always feeling like there is no place here for me

Now an isolated figure
so far away
Time has broken me
And plagued my memory

Detached from myself
Walking empty and alone
Soulless victim
Angel of misery



gugurnya tugu ilusi

Terhimpit pilu di dada,
Mengalir deras air mata,
Kala sepi terus melanda,
Sayu, pilu ku terasa...

Sewaktu dingin malam berlalu,
Bintang menjadi tempat mengadu,
Persoalan membelengu diri,
Duka menghiris hati ini.

Apakah memang ku bersalah?
Untuk memendam rasa cinta?
Adakah benar cinta yang ku alami?
Atau hanya sekadar ilusi?

Pabila ku hampir terlena,
Pelukan bayangmu yang ku rasa,
Alunan suaramu membisik sayu di telinga,
Lakaran wajahmu menghiasi mimpi indah...

Akan ku musnahkan tugu harapan,
Akan ku anggap kau sebagai teman,
Sekiranya kita berdua,
Tidak ditakdirkan bersama...



unanswered?

What has my lyfe morphed into?
I've been hurt,
Wounded ever so deeply.
But does anyone care?
You, you, or even you?
No, everybody's juz busy wit their lyfes.
Carin' for their own happiness,
Oblivious to the surrounding.
The fake, "I care for u!" phrase,
I'm tired of it all.
Just let me weep & cry in silence.
Let my heart bleed.
Coz it doesn't matter to u,
No it doesn't.
U dun even wonder y.
Do u?

Shattered,
Broken,
Hurt,
Tired,
Wounded,
Bruised,
Unanswered?

Wearin' a fake smile,
I enclosed the sadness in me..
I create lame jokes,
To liven up the joyness within me.
But does it really lasts long?
Am I that strong?
To hide how hurt I am?
Am I?

Leave me alone.
For all that matters now,
Im gonna be like u-
Ignorant to everytin'
It's no use to pretend that u care,
I'm dead.
Every hour & minute,
Is my death...



hanya untuk mu...

Tatkala bintang menemani bumi,
Memori dahulu ku kupas kembali.
Rindu pun bertandang,
Kemasyghulan menyelimuti hati...

Berbaring pada ambin kebingungan,
Aku menyelak tabir kenangan,
Mencari penamat beribu soalan...
"Mengapa? Mengapa? Aku gugup.

Seringkali bayangan mu diingati,
Kesyahduan menenggelami jiwa.
Aku dambakan belaian mu,
Tangan yang mengusap lembut dahiku...

Namun, semuanya telah ditelan waktu.
13 tahun sudah pun berlalu.
Kau telah lama pergi dan tidak mungkin kan kembali.
Aku mengerti, kau yang lebih disayangi...

Ayah, mungkinkah dikau sedang sentiasa
mendoakan puterimu ini?
Melihatku mengorak langkah ke alam dewasa...
Dari jendela istana abadimu disana?

Hanya dapat ku titip doa,
Diiringi jernih air mataku...
Semoga Tuhan menempatkanmu di tempat
orang-orang yang beriman.
Semoga jua Tuhan mencucuri rahmat keatas rohmu...
Amin.

prinsessa

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NNaive
UUnderstanding
RReliable
SShy
YYoung
AAdorable
HHypersensitive
IIrresistible
DDreamer
AArtistic

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Saturday, February 26, 2005

Hola! Sorie, been 'busy' these few daes. Juz got back from 'joggin'. Yeah rite, joggin'. I'm gettin' FAT! Fatty Syahida! Fat, fat, fat. Fatty Syahida. *Syahida teases herself* Aniwaes, I failed to attend lessons, which means I had broken my promise. Ambel, the module instructor even caught us not attendin' the lectures but lucky, it ain't a BIG deal.

Sat/Sun, 19/20 Feb- We had our ICA presentation, consists of 30% of our exams' marks. Jannah & me decided to work on the presentation stuffs. Oh boy! Imagine, only 2 of us werkin' on it! Howeva, we managed to complete it within 2 consecutive, sweat-full daes.

  • 1st dae we did it was at Tamp, unda Kak Su's blck. Coincidentally, tat was the day Tamp ave 8 was in fire due to the hort, blazin' weather. It was fun tho, coz doin' unda Kak Su's blck was a last minute plan. Before tat, we SHOP 4 project materials & foods. & I really mean SHOP. Fascinating! Delightful!


    Oh, before I forgot, we met these 3 kids. Our new frenz! Cute aren't they? But poor us, we only knew one of the kids names. I'll protect the name for privacy. =P

  • 2nd dae was at Eunos. I overslept coz exhaustion overcums me. Werked on those tins til late nite. I went home ard 11 plus. But phew, we r lucky- we only need to touch-up on certain parts. Overall, our project was marvelperfectcredibly done! 3 cheers & 3 cheers & 3 cheers to Jan & Sya! Hip, hip, HURRAY! Hip. hip, HURRAY! Hip, hip, HURRAY! Haha..

(Masuk bakul, angkat sdri..)

Mon, 21 Feb- ICA dae! WOW we did it! The lecturer praised our art pieces! Pheeweet! Hope we scored well... =) BOO HOO HOO! I dun wanna change sub-groups! I lurve & truly lurve, & deeply lurve my belurved group 2! We are such nice peepz! Dun change us, Oh Ms Joelle... I begged u. Puhleeze.. Group 2 are such well-mannered, adorable bunch!

Fri, 25 Feb- Well, well, on Fri, I SKIPPED lecture AGAIN! Nauty me... Sheesh! Look, here are a few pics tat I & my frens took while discussin' for another ICA. Projects, projects, a whole load of projects...




Look at these two. Lyke Makcik kpo only. I wonder wat are they doin'.. Hey, aren't we supposed to discuss for our project? Aren't we?


Jannah, puhleeze, maintain ur facial expression. Haha.. Sorie, tis pic was taken candid.


Miss No Fear. Ooh.. scared.


Miss Edu-ketot.


Puheleeze stop playin' ur Hp. I repeat, puhleeze stop playin' ur Hp. We need to discuss the project. Hehe..


Oh No! Dun take my pic! I'm every camera's nitemare. I'm camera un-friendly. U get wat I mean.


Here's the proffessor-to-be. Tis is wat u call, doin' 'project'. Haha... & u noe wat was I readin'? Look below.. Yeah, it's rite below..


'Baby Care Book' Project? Nah..
Haiyah, there's so many projects. Exams nearin' too.. Sigh.


Sat, 26/Feb (today)- Went to Woodlands coz we need to discuss 'bout the project. Actually we were supposed to go to my kuzzies' hse, to interview both her & her son, Ezin. In the end, we went to Kak Su's auntie's hse. The toddler, Siti Nur Raihan was damn adorable. The eyelashes were curly-wurly. Well, an undeniable fact was tat the eyes look lyke Jannah. Droopy eyes, & curly-wurly, long eyelashes. Can I change eyes wit u, Jannah! May I, may I? Nah.. I'm proud to have my own hard-to-see-eyelid, eyes, & short, fine eyelashes. Thankies aniwaes.

I really ate alot today tat I felt sinful. I feel like barfing wat I ate but no, there was nowhere to barf at. I'm gettin' fat & it's an ENORMOUSLY, HUMONGOUSLY, BIG crime to me. Sigh.. Sigh.. Sigh agian. So, my decision was to jog, exercise, at nite. I did it, but only 'bout 1 round of the field. Tot of joggin' up & down the stairs but I was too LAZEE...

Okielah, till den. I'll update again. Toodles, Tataz, Smoochiezz n& Smuackiezz to ya'll!

with love, syahida at 2/26/2005 08:55:00 PM

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