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stolen soul

My heart is jaded
Completely desolate inside
No longer feel alive

Depleted by negativity
Drained of all emotion
Impalpable to society
Always feeling like there is no place here for me

Now an isolated figure
so far away
Time has broken me
And plagued my memory

Detached from myself
Walking empty and alone
Soulless victim
Angel of misery



gugurnya tugu ilusi

Terhimpit pilu di dada,
Mengalir deras air mata,
Kala sepi terus melanda,
Sayu, pilu ku terasa...

Sewaktu dingin malam berlalu,
Bintang menjadi tempat mengadu,
Persoalan membelengu diri,
Duka menghiris hati ini.

Apakah memang ku bersalah?
Untuk memendam rasa cinta?
Adakah benar cinta yang ku alami?
Atau hanya sekadar ilusi?

Pabila ku hampir terlena,
Pelukan bayangmu yang ku rasa,
Alunan suaramu membisik sayu di telinga,
Lakaran wajahmu menghiasi mimpi indah...

Akan ku musnahkan tugu harapan,
Akan ku anggap kau sebagai teman,
Sekiranya kita berdua,
Tidak ditakdirkan bersama...



unanswered?

What has my lyfe morphed into?
I've been hurt,
Wounded ever so deeply.
But does anyone care?
You, you, or even you?
No, everybody's juz busy wit their lyfes.
Carin' for their own happiness,
Oblivious to the surrounding.
The fake, "I care for u!" phrase,
I'm tired of it all.
Just let me weep & cry in silence.
Let my heart bleed.
Coz it doesn't matter to u,
No it doesn't.
U dun even wonder y.
Do u?

Shattered,
Broken,
Hurt,
Tired,
Wounded,
Bruised,
Unanswered?

Wearin' a fake smile,
I enclosed the sadness in me..
I create lame jokes,
To liven up the joyness within me.
But does it really lasts long?
Am I that strong?
To hide how hurt I am?
Am I?

Leave me alone.
For all that matters now,
Im gonna be like u-
Ignorant to everytin'
It's no use to pretend that u care,
I'm dead.
Every hour & minute,
Is my death...



hanya untuk mu...

Tatkala bintang menemani bumi,
Memori dahulu ku kupas kembali.
Rindu pun bertandang,
Kemasyghulan menyelimuti hati...

Berbaring pada ambin kebingungan,
Aku menyelak tabir kenangan,
Mencari penamat beribu soalan...
"Mengapa? Mengapa? Aku gugup.

Seringkali bayangan mu diingati,
Kesyahduan menenggelami jiwa.
Aku dambakan belaian mu,
Tangan yang mengusap lembut dahiku...

Namun, semuanya telah ditelan waktu.
13 tahun sudah pun berlalu.
Kau telah lama pergi dan tidak mungkin kan kembali.
Aku mengerti, kau yang lebih disayangi...

Ayah, mungkinkah dikau sedang sentiasa
mendoakan puterimu ini?
Melihatku mengorak langkah ke alam dewasa...
Dari jendela istana abadimu disana?

Hanya dapat ku titip doa,
Diiringi jernih air mataku...
Semoga Tuhan menempatkanmu di tempat
orang-orang yang beriman.
Semoga jua Tuhan mencucuri rahmat keatas rohmu...
Amin.

prinsessa

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NNaive
UUnderstanding
RReliable
SShy
YYoung
AAdorable
HHypersensitive
IIrresistible
DDreamer
AArtistic

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Wednesday, November 23, 2005


SLAMAT MENYAMBUT HARI LEBARAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorie gue terlambat sejenak ler...
1st dae raye was damn bz as usual- but not as bz as the previous yrs lah..
lucky i'm not the 'tukang-cuci-pinggan-mangkuk-gurl'.
but i'm still the 'tukang-cuci-tong-sampah-gurl'.
eeew, gross. here's my family pic 4 the 1st dae.

(double click to enlarge)

tis is only 21/4 of my family- maternal. 23/4 missing.

yipee.. got a new layout 4 tis bloggie of mine.. k, lemme update sum bits of my lyfe's latest. daes actually speed pasts me. pejam, celik, pejam, celik- eh, dah nak abis raya.. cepatnyer... tutup mata, buka mata- eh, dah 18 rupa2nya... org tu biler lagi? tu org tu... klau tak salah, namer die Nurul Shafiqah Ismail.. bila mau 18? hehehe... maafkn kakak eh, dik. =P

well, actually i'm not in my tip-top mood these few daes... tins hasnt been goin' well at work.. customers, the staffs there... bingit sih!
y is there such tins as customers rite? urgh... unfair! i've tot of quittin tat job. sigh... oh ya, i've got a job to do part-time commercial.
went 4 the interview n walla, the talent agency called me & offered the job, but only if i'm not werkin' my present job lar...
wat if i found the commercial 'thingy' is fake only wen i had quit my present job? u get wat i mean dont u... seriously, i've tot of switchin' to another job. n tat means, no more staff d/c... !!!!! nooooooooooo!!!!
watever..

hmm, maybe i cud try my skewl lib... try n ask for lobang. khekhekhe. syahida keja kat lib skolah... enuff bout stoopid, werkin' lyfe of mine..

16 & 17 Nov 2005- went jlning hari raya wit NYP lecture pals.
tiring but fun 1st dae went home at 12 but 2nd dae was ard 2a.m plus, plus.. kecoh abis. here's sum pics-

me on the right. wearin' orange.





still on the right, sittin' dwn.

19 Nov 2005 Sat, was a remarkable dae 4 my elder sis.
Happy engagement sis!
may u n ur fiance be happy together & 4eva...
aww, so sweet of me... =) wei, u shud thk me tau for bein' ur photographer tat dae tho ade pics mcm sewel sikit.. hwhwahwa.. i'll update the pics later..

21 Nov, went tourin' ard Orchard. ate at pizza huts... took sum pics... checked out sum sales prior 2 x'mas..

k lah, i'm sooooo shleepy rite now..... nitez, toodles...



with love, syahida at 11/23/2005 02:36:00 AM

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