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stolen soul

My heart is jaded
Completely desolate inside
No longer feel alive

Depleted by negativity
Drained of all emotion
Impalpable to society
Always feeling like there is no place here for me

Now an isolated figure
so far away
Time has broken me
And plagued my memory

Detached from myself
Walking empty and alone
Soulless victim
Angel of misery



gugurnya tugu ilusi

Terhimpit pilu di dada,
Mengalir deras air mata,
Kala sepi terus melanda,
Sayu, pilu ku terasa...

Sewaktu dingin malam berlalu,
Bintang menjadi tempat mengadu,
Persoalan membelengu diri,
Duka menghiris hati ini.

Apakah memang ku bersalah?
Untuk memendam rasa cinta?
Adakah benar cinta yang ku alami?
Atau hanya sekadar ilusi?

Pabila ku hampir terlena,
Pelukan bayangmu yang ku rasa,
Alunan suaramu membisik sayu di telinga,
Lakaran wajahmu menghiasi mimpi indah...

Akan ku musnahkan tugu harapan,
Akan ku anggap kau sebagai teman,
Sekiranya kita berdua,
Tidak ditakdirkan bersama...



unanswered?

What has my lyfe morphed into?
I've been hurt,
Wounded ever so deeply.
But does anyone care?
You, you, or even you?
No, everybody's juz busy wit their lyfes.
Carin' for their own happiness,
Oblivious to the surrounding.
The fake, "I care for u!" phrase,
I'm tired of it all.
Just let me weep & cry in silence.
Let my heart bleed.
Coz it doesn't matter to u,
No it doesn't.
U dun even wonder y.
Do u?

Shattered,
Broken,
Hurt,
Tired,
Wounded,
Bruised,
Unanswered?

Wearin' a fake smile,
I enclosed the sadness in me..
I create lame jokes,
To liven up the joyness within me.
But does it really lasts long?
Am I that strong?
To hide how hurt I am?
Am I?

Leave me alone.
For all that matters now,
Im gonna be like u-
Ignorant to everytin'
It's no use to pretend that u care,
I'm dead.
Every hour & minute,
Is my death...



hanya untuk mu...

Tatkala bintang menemani bumi,
Memori dahulu ku kupas kembali.
Rindu pun bertandang,
Kemasyghulan menyelimuti hati...

Berbaring pada ambin kebingungan,
Aku menyelak tabir kenangan,
Mencari penamat beribu soalan...
"Mengapa? Mengapa? Aku gugup.

Seringkali bayangan mu diingati,
Kesyahduan menenggelami jiwa.
Aku dambakan belaian mu,
Tangan yang mengusap lembut dahiku...

Namun, semuanya telah ditelan waktu.
13 tahun sudah pun berlalu.
Kau telah lama pergi dan tidak mungkin kan kembali.
Aku mengerti, kau yang lebih disayangi...

Ayah, mungkinkah dikau sedang sentiasa
mendoakan puterimu ini?
Melihatku mengorak langkah ke alam dewasa...
Dari jendela istana abadimu disana?

Hanya dapat ku titip doa,
Diiringi jernih air mataku...
Semoga Tuhan menempatkanmu di tempat
orang-orang yang beriman.
Semoga jua Tuhan mencucuri rahmat keatas rohmu...
Amin.

prinsessa

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NNaive
UUnderstanding
RReliable
SShy
YYoung
AAdorable
HHypersensitive
IIrresistible
DDreamer
AArtistic

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Thursday, February 15, 2007



double chocalate... yummy!
i actually queued for the doughnuts at the doughnut factory, raffles city.
rite after my attachment.
n it took me nearly 4 darn hours to get the doughnut.
feets aching and all.
but watever.

i reckon those who havent try, to try it!
especially MY double chocolate. hees.
the dark chocolate fillings tat oozes out made me 'smack that'.

n to talk bout dietin' previously...
hahaha.. syahida, syahida.




oh ya, i spent 20 bucks on 2 books at MPH.
10 bucks each, on impulse.


it's worth buyin' tho. i'm definitely satisfied. =)

I JUZ LURVE BOOKS!


i love you books! haha.
n tat was how i celebrated my valentines.
'dating' my books.
no, more like dating the 'ahpeks' n 'nyonyas' in the hospital.
coz i'm on afternoon shift during valentines.
sheesh...


anw, my cuzzie won the blogtv thingy.
kudos to u.
if i'm not wrong they held tis contest in conjunction wit 'v' day.
and it was aired on CNA. sweet.
haha, she's funny. the whole interview is funny.
Kak Lisa, yup, u look fat. no, it's horizontally challenged.
hehehehehehe. sorry.
cheeseburgers, french fries... =P
dunno y the 'Flying Dutchman' can tolerate ur bdae cake nonsense.
haha. no lah, it's actually creatively romantic.
singlishly, "vely lomantic."
two thumbs up.


hmmm.. attchment is progressing well.
hope notin' happens.
i wanna maximise n apply the skills learnt.
i'd have to prepare myself physically n mentally for the comin' PRCP.
PRCP i s a 6 wks attachment at a particular ward.
tis will later determine if we cud graduate frm the Dip in Nursin'.


gua banyak stress tau.. lu apa tahu..
aiyoh, banyak-banyak penat.


ohkay. now back to my dieting.
so much for my resolution.
so much for bettin' wit nurul tat i'm gonna shoo my 5kg away.
i gained more n more weight each day.
watever i wear, it looks tight.
even my nursin' uniform.
damn!!!!!!!
urgh...... how????
i'm gonna hv a pouch growin' on my tummy soon.
help! i'm gonna becum a kangaroo!!!

i'm too tired to exercise.
n if i dun eat, i wud feel really, really weak.
my 'hypo' state as i always say.
cold sweats will form. n my hands will start to shiver.
like an addict.
thx to my colleagues n frens who always forces me to eat.
i'm now officially addicted to food.
btw, i'm not like tis till my 1st yr, 2nd sem in poly.
i rmmbr how flat my tummy used to be.
even wen i sit down, i'm tummyfats-free.
how i wish i dint listen to 'em.
i wudnt have to worry now.


nevermind, i'm gonna resume my healthy habits tis one wk break.
gonna exercise!!! gonna diet!!!
sumbdy, support me!!!!!!!
Go Syahida Go! Do Syahida Do IT!

E to the X

to the E

to the R

to the C

to the I

to the S

to the E.

wats tat spell?

EXERCISE.

wats tat spell????

EXERCISE!!!!!!!


i need me to discipline myself.
boost me.

with love, syahida at 2/15/2007 08:45:00 PM

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